Why do I do this?

An unfinished draft from Skyler's school paper I stole because I loved so much reading about. He isn't a big talker so this is the most I had ever heard about the goings on during comps especially ones we can't attend. He is talking about last years comps not this years. At this moment he is in Florida, Disneyworld at the Worlds Comp again-Desirae the Mom

 Last years Photos from Worlds.

 I love to think back to the days when we got to go to the cheerleading worlds, thinking about all the stunt party’s that where around every corner, watching all the best people in the world throw girls around like I never thought possible, and people flipping around like they were on the moon. At worlds I learned so much, and met so many of the people in that to me where the most outstanding people in the world. When I left Florida after it was all over, I knew that it had been worth it. 3 practices a week for a year, all the injuries and sweat me and my team went through. Was nothing in comparison to how marvelous the worlds experience was.

 I love to think back to the days when we got to go to the cheerleading worlds, thinking about all the stunt party’s that where around every corner, watching all the best people in the world throw girls around like I never thought possible, and people flipping around like they were on the moon. At worlds I learned so much, and met so many of the people in that to me where the most outstanding people in the world. When I left Florida after it was all over, I knew that it had been worth it. 3 practices a week for a year, all the injuries and sweat me and my team went through. Was nothing in comparison to how marvelous the worlds experience was.

In the summer before, it wasn’t always so easy to see what we were working for. It was at least 90 degrees outside, and in our little tin can we called TNT all-stars it was like 110. When it gets that hot even the easiest things become hard. Trying to hold someone above your head while her sweat covered legs slide through your hands, like all the boys who try and climb the oiled pole at scout camp. Tumbling was even harder with the heat making your legs feel cumbersome. After every pass they just felt like Jell-O. the worst part was probably the yelling. Looking in to your coaches eyes and trying to listen as he yells at you for anything and everything that wasn’t perfect. The only good part of every practice was our drink breaks. The water from the drinking fountain on those days was like drinking from a little stream melting off of a glacier. Every practice I would run the same question through my head, “Why am I doing this?”, and “is this even worth it?”

After months of practice we finally got to compete. Having several local competitions before any of the important ones in out of state. To get to worlds we had to get a bid. Which are only given away at big competitions in places like Texas, Las Vegas, and California. And if you got one it meant that one of the cheer companies thought you were good enough to invest one of there bids in and you got to go to worlds.. Our first competition in Las Vegas was nerve wracking. It was my first time competing in front of a big crowd. I remember going through the whole warm up process I threw up twice. It was a very fast time you had to warm up. Your whole team gets 3 minutes on a little tumbling floor to warm up, and then 3 min on the warm up mat to warm up stunts and do a walk through. And after you warm up you sit there and wait for the longest 20 minutes of your life to pass be fore you go on stage. The whole time I was trying to fight myself and not throw up. Knowing that I would have to preform in front of all those people soon just makes your stomach feel like you have a million enraged butterflies trying to scratch there way out of your stomach. Once again making me ask myself, why do I do this? 

It was scary walking on that stage, not really being able to see the audience through the spotlight shining at the stage, but even though I couldn’t see them, I was still scared of them and what they would think. Standing in our beginning formation, I felt so weak and tired; that I thought I wasn’t going to be able to do the first stunt. Sitting there waiting for them to press play on the music, I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself down. It was funny how the second the music started and my partner stunt hit, all my nervousness and tiredness just went away. I guess that is what we have been training our self to do over the past months by doing the routine full out after full out. It was really training our selves to turn our brains off and just do the routine. It is kind of cool how it worked, your body just focused and did what it had been doing for months. Well that is until you messed up.

During the routine we had a bobble on the main stunt. Which wasn’t a huge deal but it would get us a deduction. I remember how the second it bobbled my mind went from back from its focused state, too the way it was before and I got nervous again. I also forgot where I was going. And was late on the jumps. After that I finished to routine without anymore errors, but I felt awful for having let my team down. And after my couch yelled at me I went outside and thought about all the work we all went through, and how bad I felt for risking our chances of getting a bid.

It was 10 o’clock at night by the time awards started, sitting there on the floor waiting for awards was hard; all I wanted to do was get up. There was almost no room to breathe, in such a tight circle with my team, and being back to back with the team behind me. It made my back tired from sitting in such a weird position. Looking around everyone looked so happy and excited it made me mad. I was just so nervous. Soon enough I would know if all our work would pay off, but I had a feeling we wouldn’t get the bid because of our little errors. No matter how much I hoped we would. When the awards started I really wasn’t paying much attention. It was just name after name as they went through each division; starting with the small girls making there way to the large coed teams. As each teams name was announced and they all ran on to the floor to pose with the big red and gold throne. That had been set out to take pictures by with your team when you one. It finally got to our division, even though I didn’t care much for division placement. I still wanted to know. 3^rd place was senior elite, watching them go up. Made me really hope we one it. 2^nd TNT all-stars. It  was a pretty happy moment, and I already knew we wouldn’t bet California all-stars. Second place was really good. And I was happy we got that. And now that they where done with division placement the would give out the bids.

There was 3 at large bids and 1 full paid bid. A full paid bid would get your whole teams trip to worlds paid for. But only goes to teams who already had a bid. That meant that 3 out of 17 teams where going for a bid. The announcer was talking a lot. I just wanted him to get on with it. And he finally did. He gave the first bid out. Fusion all-stars. It wasn’t a good feeling only two bids left. And I wanted both of the teams from my gym to get one. Us and the small girls team, Explosion. The girls team hit a flawless routine and deserved one over us. After they finished taking a picture of the first team which looked way happier then any of the other teams who had gone up so far. They got on to the second bid, I was nervous, this was the moment if we both wanted to go we both needed one. The announcer asked for a drum roll. Every one clapping there hands to thighs was eagerly listening. As he announced the winners. TNT all-stars.

It was an exiting and confusing moment as of our teams where exited but we weren’t sure which one if us had one it. Until they the words large co-ed level 5 were announced. That was probably the second happiest moment of my life. We all jumped up and were hugging, crying and laughing with joy. As we went up for a second time to take the picture with the throne it was amazing the difference between to 2 picture. One we where happy, the other we had rays of happiness coming out of our huge uncontrollable smiles, but explosion still needed a bid.as we sat back down with explosion it was hard not to act to happy. It was kind of awkward that we had a bid and they didn’t. but was the next set of drum rolls started and they announced the last bid. The awkwardness turned in to pure joy as they also got a bid, which was the first happiest moment of my life. We would both go to worlds.

After the awards, we went out as a gym and got some food. I wanted to go to somewhere fast like McDonald’s because it was so late. But everyone wanted to go to hard rock café. It was a little past 11 when we got there and the staff didn’t look to happy about it, but it was still fun. It took a lot longer to get our food then it would have if we had just gone to McDonalds but it was worth it. I got an cheese burger. And it was probably the best cheeseburger I have ever had. Definitely better then anything I could have gotten at McDonalds, And definitely worth the wait.  It made me think about how the whole year was. At any point we could have chosen to practice less or not as intensely, but that was what made the us get the bid. And just like the extra time we waited to get an amazing meal at hard rock café, our practicing mad the end result much better. I finally knew the answer to my question “why do I do this”.

(You simply amazing and I LOVE watching you at comps. Keep up the good work.)-Mom