Not A Pity Party...

I have been a little troubled lately. I was suggesting to a child that they should marry a certain individual that I like and deem worthy. Now before everyone starts preaching to me, I want you to know that I have always thought of myself as a wanna be match maker when in fact Danny has been the successful one on a couple of occasions.

Well let me get back to the point. After stating my opinion Danny stated that this child should NOT marry this person due to their health issues. Another child said that that wasn't very nice ( I did too, it was a mean.) They then said "Are you saying you wouldn't have married Mom then?"

His reply was "No I wouldn't have knowing my children could have inherited Idiopathic Dialated Cardiomyopathy." Now this may have felt like a punch to the stomach for me and my kids were a little upset by his revelation.

But...

He is right. Right?

All of us "damaged" people should be sent off to some far island were we can die alone. Isn't that what Hitler was doing? Who could love us?

I remember Dr. Wang telling me that IDCM is hereditary, my mom has it as well. Tears sprang to my eyes and I though WHAT HAVE I DONE to my kids?! How can this be happening? I would never had kids had I known, although it is not certain that any of them will get it. But I felt and still feel guilty and panic when they tell me their hearts are doing weird things. Things I know all too well.

It also makes me feel that I am undesirable as a wife. I am a throw back.

Just like in the Divergent series, the world wants to get rid of the people who are faulty. The books are not necessarily about health but same guide lines.

I am not going to dwell on this to much longer because it was out of my hands and in no way my fault. I believe that all people need love and companionship especially those who have to deal with the lot God gave them. For they are the strongest people you will ever meet.